I feel like I have been a little too open lately. I have always heard that a true friend gives honest answers and that sharing deep parts of yourself brings you closer to people. I found that it only works with people who REALLY love. They don’t have to be life-long friends or even people you know, they just have to love. I understand that some things should be kept to yourself but the things we tend to keep hidden are the things that matter most, our deepest feelings, doubts, fears and failures. I want anyone who is love to know all of those about me. I think some people might not want to see the depths of my heart and that is ok and understandable.
I was thinking today when I had around 4 grown men tell me their shame and how they messed up their life how open people can be when someone is open to listen without judgment. They knew I was only there because I loved and cared about them so they shared with me their stories. There is nothing more interesting then the stories of the homeless. I would stay there all day listening to them, and that is all they really want, someone to listen. This openness I found today just showed me how I want to be with everyone. I have found that I always end up giving so much of myself to others who I don’t think really wanted to know so much about me.
I have no solution or final idea, just that I loved today and wish that my friends would be that open to me so I wouldn’t feel weird about being so open to them. It reminds me of the Lifehouse song lyrics “I tried my best to be guarded; I'm an open book instead”. I want to be an open book and I think I am.