Thursday, November 5, 2009

Again

I am once again going to try to live by my own advice and stop idolizing something and give it to Him. I do not know why it is so hard. I have no complainants about giving it to Him but that doesn't make it hurt any less. I have thought one way for the last 4 years and to just stop my mind is very challenging. Luckily God is so much greater then I and He can do it easily. He wont make it easy because then I will not get the full benefit but He will never give me more then I can handle. I hate feeling like I was powerless in this situation, but who am I to change fate? I may have done everything right but it was just not part of the plan. I just hope I can someday truly believe that and not think I was inadequate. I just need to let go of it and let more of God in to fill the space I have been filling with something earthly which has only brought pain. I will be able to find all the joy I need in Christ.

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